Poor Man’s Lobster Cioppino

Posted on June 4, 2014

Welcome to the 17th installment of Slow Liz’s 2014 Slow Cooker Challenge!

Recipe: Seafood Cioppino – Taste of Home

Seafood Cioppino

I have Post Traumatic Seafood Disorder and this will be my last (and first) seafood recipe.

I was craving seafood stew and the Taste of Home Seafood Cioppino recipe seemed like the best choice for a crockpot. It’s a flavorful yet fresh stew because the seafood isn’t added to the crockpot until 15 minutes before you are ready to eat.

And to think it started out as smoothly as it did… I do the ol’ crockpot dump, adding in all the ingredients. The crockpot got turned on, and I went about my day.

I had an appointment and decided I would pick up the seafood while I was out. Wifey said I should look for a halibut. But when I got there, the halibut was $37.99 a pound. There was NO WAY I was going to buy fish that cost $37.99 a pound. It doesn’t take a genius to know that when you’ve never cooked fish, you don’t start out with the $37.99/lb fish.



So I’m weighing my options when a stranger approaches and says “a fish stew eh? you have to try monkfish tail”. I was like no thanks. I don’t eat tail and monkfish sounds scary. He insisted it was delicious and the perfect addition to a fish stew. He said it had the texture of scallops, I told him I don’t eat scallops because of the texture. Then I saw the price and I bought the monkfish tail. I also bought shrimp and crabmeat.

So I finish shopping and the monkfish, the crab, and the shrimp accompany me to my therapy appointment. I anxiously told SuperShrink about the conversation I’d had at the grocery store. And before I could say ‘I bought the monkfish’ she said ‘oh no, don’t get the monkfish’ and then I said ‘I got the monkfish’. She assured me ‘it’s not so bad, it’s the poor man’s lobster’, but I didn’t feel very reassured.

After therapy, I came home and realized the legs and skin were still on the shrimp and the monkfish was slimy. And I was freaked out. So I turned to Facebook for help.

Cioppino Mistake

Fortunately I have some good friends:

Heidi Cioppino

Armaghan Cioppino

So I put on some workout clothes and got to work in the kitchen. I sawed (unkindly) through the monkfish. I used tongs and a knife to pull off the legs and skin off the shrimp (I bought 10 shrimp and got through 6 before my gag reflex went into effect). I added the crab and let the fiasco simmer for about 15 minutes.

And then we ate. I was so grossed out that I didn’t bother trying the monkfish.

Wifey said it was delicious and had seconds.

Poor Man's Lobster Cioppino

I, on the other hand, feel it’s best if seafood and I take a break from each other.

And that, my friends, is why I will never make another seafood dish.


…and if you haven’t done so yet, please check out (and sign?) my petition! Your signature will help get me over that first 1k mark!

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